Friday continued to be a good day for me and I felt few side effects from my treatment the day before. And because I felt good, I did and did and did some more. By the kids’ weekend bedtime, I was shot physically and emotionally. I wouldn’t say that I put it in a full “normal” day as I had help from my parents and we were blessed to have dinner provided for us by a good friends; but, I did far more than I had on the days following treatment last time. Thankfully when I decided I needed to be done for the day, I could just be done.

Unfortunately, what we learned the next morning is that I can’t wait that late. When I woke up Saturday morning, I was groggier than I had been on Friday, which I can only attribute to the fact that I took the anti-nausea medication that is also known to cause drowsiness later than I had been taking it. This drowsiness isn’t just like being tired it is more like the whole world is fuzzy or the edges of everything are softer than normal making it seem like you are walking in a dream – you know what is going on but it seems almost like you are watching it rather than participating in it. Even though I was feeling the fog and was a bit achy – thanks to my injection to keep my blood counts up – I went to the middle boys’ last basketball game of the year. After the game, I needed a nap. It amazes me how exhausting it can be to just get out of the house and watch someone else exercise these days. Even after napping, I was worn out and needed to just hang out with the family and rest the remainder of the evening.

Sunday I woke up feeling pretty good. I had remembered to take my medication earlier the night before which definitely makes a difference. I went to church and then we all went to a friend’s house for lunch. Shortly after lunch, I was again reminded how tiring it is to just be out of the house. I am grateful that the friends that we were around were willing to repeat themselves and to ignore the fact that I was fading in and out of being completely present. If you don’t have people like that in your life, find yourself some. It is amazing to not have to worry about being “on top of your game” every time you are around people. Sunday also required a nap. Andy has been wonderful about letting me rest regularly and making sure that I don’t feel guilty about all of the time he is pulling extra weight around here.

Learning what I can do and what is too much has truly been quite the learning curve. When I feel good, I want to be able to go and go and go. I can’t do that. I have to learn to rest. I have to learn to set new limits. I have to learn to ask for and accept help. Please be praying with me that I can learn these things without having to repeatedly learn the hard way. My body needs me to learn sooner rather than later.